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Wednesday, April 29, 2020

Praying when your children have children


“God began by making one person, and from Him came all the different people who live everywhere in the world. God decided exactly when and where they must live.”  — Acts 17:26 NCV


Praying When Your Children Have Children
by Jodie Berndt from Praying the Scriptures for your Adult Children
Meet Jodie Berndt
I Will Pour Out My Spirit On Your Offspring
I will pour out My Spirit on your offspring, and My blessing on your descendants. — Isaiah 44:3

Back when Praying the Scriptures for Your Children was released, my mom told me she wished she’d had it as a resource when my siblings and I were growing up. I had two thoughts. The first was that she didn’t need a book to help her pray the Scriptures; my mother is one of the most biblically literate and powerful prayer warriors I know.

The second was that I was glad she had the book then, because she was using it to pray for my children. They were ages five through eleven, and at the time, my daily life was a blur of car pools, soccer games, homework, meal prep, and laundry. (And that was before you factored in all my Very Important Jobs, like organizing the hula-hoop competition for the elementary school’s annual Bazooka Blowout.) There were plenty of days when I barely had time to throw up a “God, bless Annesley,” let alone beseech God to instill in her things like compassion, discernment, or the ability to speak kindly to her siblings.

I had attended a Christian parenting conference where one of the speakers asked, “If you aren’t praying for your children, who is?” I know the speaker meant that as a motivational charge, but honestly? I heard her and felt guilty. Even though I’d written a book about praying for your children, I didn’t always do a good job of actually doing it. I wanted to spend time asking God to fill my kids with wisdom and bless them with godly friendships and all, but it seemed like somebody was always throwing up, falling down, or needing me to make a turkey costume because all of the Pilgrim parts had been taken.

I needed reinforcements. And knowing that my parents were on the job — that they were talking to God about my kids’ health and their character and their relationship with Jesus — was an indescribable gift.

My friend Susan understands the value of this gift. She has five married children and twenty-one grandkids. In order to pray for them all, she assigns a day of the week to each family. And knowing she can go where her children sometimes can’t (“Grandkids roll their eyes less at grandparents than they do at parents,” she says), she doesn’t mind letting the younger generation know she is praying, whether it’s for a little one’s fear of going to sleep-away camp for the first time or an older child’s yearning for friends. Even the most unremarkable events — like soccer games or math tests — can become an invitation to pray.

For instance, Susan’s grandson Will was a sophomore in high school, facing a particularly challenging exam that could affect his overall GPA and ultimately his college applications. When Susan heard about the test, she asked God to provide things like mental clarity, alertness, and the ability for Will to recall what he had learned and do well — but she didn’t tell her grandson all of those details. Instead, when exam day rolled around, she sent him a simple text message: I am praying for you.

Afterward, Will was clearly excited. He’d done better than he’d hoped he would, and — whether he was smarter than he thought or the test was just easier than he expected — he figured that having a praying grandma in his corner had to be a plus.

Susan has prayed similar prayers for all of her grandchildren, asking God to provide everything from good health to good time management. “Children are all different,” she told me, “but a lot of their needs are the same. They all need safety, wisdom, protection from evil, fellowship opportunities, and godly mates (if they are to marry). They need the sorts of things you wrote about in Praying the Scriptures for Your Children. I use those prayers for my grandchildren!”

I was grateful for that endorsement, but I knew I hadn’t covered everything in that book. How, for instance, did Susan pray for her own children, now that they’d become parents? (I don’t have grandchildren yet, but I want to be ready — and who better to learn from than someone who has been there twenty-one times?)

Susan told me she and her husband, John, began praying for their daughters and daughters-in-law as soon as they learned they were expecting. “John and I prayed Psalm 139 during our kids’ pregnancies, asking God to fill them with peace about their unborn babies, knowing that he was forming them and ordaining all of their days — including the day that each child would be born.

“And as our grandchildren entered new phases, from toddler-hood to the teen years, we often prayed that our kids would call out to God for wisdom,” she continued. “Nobody really knows how to be a parent, so we asked God to give them a generous helping of wisdom, just as He promised to do.” (James 1:5)

Sometimes these wisdom prayers get very specific. When John and Susan realized that one of their sons-in-law didn’t seem to be connecting well with his son, they asked God for help. “The two guys are wired very differently,” Susan said. “I began to ask God to give [the dad] wisdom to take the initiative in the relationship, as well as the creativity to discover some common ground and shared interests with his son.”

Knowing that prayer support can be every bit as helpful to a young family as things like meals and babysitting, Susan keeps a notebook that includes specific requests for each grandchild.

“I ask my kids how I can pray for their kids,” she told me. “That’s not a very threatening question; even if your adult children aren’t walking with the Lord, they will usually be grateful for a grandparent’s love and support. And when we demonstrate love for our grandchildren by showing an interest in their lives, it’s like adding glue to our relationship with our own children and their spouses.”

Indeed. Susan and John have seen a strengthening of their family ties as the younger parents share concerns over everything from sibling relationships and character development to “non- spiritual” things like finding a soccer team for their daughter to join or a group of friends who share their son’s interest in music.

“Johnny and I are delighted when our kids and their spouses ask us to pray about something,” Susan said. “But we have to remember to watch our tongues. They are coming to us for prayer — not necessarily for advice.”

Prayer Principle

Praying for your grandchildren strengthens your relationship with your children and their spouses.

Excerpted with permission from Praying the Scriptures for Your Adult Children by Jodie Berndt, copyright Jodie Berndt.


* * *
Your Turn 

We all want to be praying for our kids and realistically during the hustle-bustle of the early years, that may be more brief than we wish it was. For grandparents, there are oftentimes even more people to be praying for on a regular basis — kids and grands! How are you praying for your people? We want to hear. Come share with us on our blog!

 
COMMENT


Trust God with the Ones You Love


Praying the Scriptures for Your Adult Children
 
by Jodie Berndt

Jodie shares personal stories, real-life examples, and biblical prayers for your adult children — whether they are just leaving the nest, flying well on their own, or struggling to take off at all.

Last chance for this $8.99 deal

Save on this book today!

List Price: $16.99

Sale Price: $8.99 - ends tomorrow 4/30
+ free shipping* with code HOPE

 
BUY NOW

As parents of adult children, we often wonder: Will my children make good choices when they’re on their own? How can I let them go when I’ve held them for so long?

Parent and author Jodie Berndt understands what it’s like to release children into the world and still care deeply about them and everything they will face.

Praying the Scriptures for Your Adult Children will equip you with Scripture-based prayers and inspiring stories from Jodie as well as other parents so you can pray effectively for your children as they navigate the world on their own.

The book is separated into five topical sections:

— Praying for Your Adult Child
— Praying for Your Adult Child's Relationships
— Praying through the Milestones in Your Adult Child's Life
— Praying for Your Adult Child's Health, Safety, and Well-Being
— Praying for Your Adult Child's Victory Over Temptation

Each chapter dives into more specific topics like marriage, grandchildren, health crises, financial difficulty, addiction, jobs and careers, and infertility. At the end of each chapter, you’ll find personalized prayers for your children taken straight from Scripture. Each chapter also includes verses for you to pray for yourself, as shown below.  

Look Inside

This book will prepare you to take the challenging step of trusting God to care for your children in ways that you can’t. After reading it, you'll walk away with a deeper understanding of what it means to parent when your children are grown, and a strong Scriptural foundation for praying through the times ahead.

 
WHAT READERS ARE SAYING

5-STAR REVIEWS


We don't stop worrying about our kids when they become adults. This book helped me to think of ways that I hadn't thought of to pray for my adult children. I love my time when I get to read with Jodie. She has comforted my worries with scripture. P.S. I think she was eavesdropping on my family! Every problem I've dealt with was in the book! — MxMom13, verified buyer


This book has been invaluable to me for 2 reasons: the gathering of relevant scriptures in one place that relate to a specific concern and praying the loved one’s name in the prayer. In all my years as a Christian, this has never occurred to me. Perhaps I was ingrained with the mandate not to add to or delete from scripture in any way but praying this way in certain instances is very meaningful and powerful. Having scripture gathered in one place allows the reader to get right to the issue at hand thereby allowing the urgency of the need not to be delayed as one searches the Scriptures. I’ll use this book many times. — Loretta B., verified buyer



More Praise for the Book


This book will never make it to my bookshelf, because it has already found a permanent home on my bedside table. I’ll pray-read it again and again.

— Sara Hagerty, author

Jodie's book is filled with stories and real-life situations that clearly identify issues every child will encounter and then lays out a praying plan to address those issues with wisdom, biblical counsel, and practical parental advice.

— Joe Battaglia, broadcaster and author

 

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